Respecting People ...

 

We had gone to Udaipur to attend the wedding of my cousin. It was a grand wedding indeed! The stage was brilliantly designed (as if a stage of Indian Idol); the speakers were beating to give out great sound; the lighting created the required ambience for each function; and finally the dances pumped up the entire celebrations!

After a few hearty laughter sessions, socializing with people, and an eating riot, we were set to return to Pune. We decided to take a Volvo bus from Udaipur to Ahmedabad; followed by a train to Pune. We were seven of us – My cousin, his wife and three kids, my wife - Arpita and me.

In the Volvo, they were showing a movie, which we had already seen. My eyes were studded onto the screen. Though the eyes were glued; my ears started hearing someone talking in a low tone. It was my wife Arpita narrating the story to the elder kid sitting next to her. The immediate thought popped up that I should give her a stare and say, “Just let her watch. Why do you want to tell her the story?”

Instantly, my eyes got magnetized to Arpita’s face. The smile on her face revealed how much she was enjoying sharing the story! The subsequent thought made me feel like a bolt of lighting had just hit me! Wouldn’t it have been a huge disrespect to Arpita if I would have shut her up and taken off that cute smile from her face, if I would have made that comment?

It so many times happens that we think we are superior to someone and just rubbish their thoughts and ideas? We don’t even give others a chance to express! Even before they have completed the sentence, we jump to conclusions thinking we already know what they want to say.

• There is a decision to be taken. My wife listens patiently and then has a suggestion to give. But I think that she doesn’t know enough. I tend to rubbish her because I think I know her (which so many times, is not the fact) and that she is not the right person to give me any advice!

• Whatever is my age, for my mother I will always remain a kid. There would be so many times I take her for granted and shout at her, when all she is showing is care and concern!

• My sister is chatting on whats app as the vegetable is cooking. Engrossed in the chat she forgets to put the gas off and the vegetable gets burnt. Before she can explain, immediately a firing starts – ‘Can’t you put aside that mobile and cook properly?’

• I am the business head. A sales person has not met the targets for the month. Before he expresses his bottlenecks, I have already thrown him out of the organization!

• My best friend responds in a way, I don’t appreciate. I already have made up my mind and decided to break away from the friendship. I don’t even care to understand his perspective!

It is kind of funny to realize that things are expected dramatically different if I am at fault. If I give a suggestion to my wife, that should be accepted like a command. Being a parent, I seem to want to have a right to say anything to my kids without being questioned. If I am chatting on whats app, and forget to do something, a ‘sorry’ should set things right. If my organization has not met the targets, any excuse out of my mouth should seem a realistic reason for non-performance. If I have done something that has upset my best friend, I expect they should listen to me completely and forgive me instantly!

I firmly believe that the cause of such an indifferent behavior is non-respect! This small incident in the bus has made me realize something, which is too crucial. Touching someone’s feet, or doing a Namaste, or holding our head low etc., is not respect. To me respect is when I can listen to people around me completely and patiently! To me respect is when I attempt to understand other person’s perspective! To me respect is when I am ready to give someone another chance! To me respect is when I don’t pretend and treat everyone equally!

In short I have decided to RESPECT PEOPLE!